Self-Help

How to use self-havening

Self-Havening is a psychosensory technique that uses touch to create a sense of calm and safety, helping to reduce stress and anxiety. Here’s how you can use the Self-Havening technique:

  1. Identify your emotional distress: Think about the specific event or situation that’s causing you distress. Bring the feelings associated with it to mind.
  2. Rate your distress: Use a scale of 0 to 10, where 0 represents no distress and 10 represents extreme distress, to assess your current emotional state. This is known as a Subjective Units of Distress (SUD) score, and it helps you track your progress as you apply the Self-Havening technique.
  3. Begin Self-Havening touch: Apply gentle, rhythmic stroking to different parts of your body. The most common areas are:
    • Upper arms: Cross your arms and gently stroke from your shoulders down to your elbows.
    • Face: Gently stroke your forehead, cheeks, and jawline.
    • Hands: Rub your palms together. You can experiment with different areas and find what feels most soothing for you. Focus on the rhythm and pressure of your touch. The key is to create a nurturing and calming sensation.
  4. Combine with distraction techniques: While applying the Self-Havening touch, engage in a distraction technique to further occupy your mind and shift your attention away from the distressing thoughts and feelings. Here are some examples:
    • Visualisation: Close your eyes and imagine yourself walking up a staircase with 20 steps. With each step, visualise the distress diminishing and a sense of peace and calm increasing. Count each step aloud as you climb.
    • Humming: Hum a familiar, neutral song like “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” for two rounds.
    • Counting your breath: Focus on your breath, counting each inhale and exhale.
  5. Repeat and reassess: Continue the Self-Havening touch and distraction technique for several rounds. After each round, take a moment to breathe deeply, open your eyes, and look from side to side to reorient yourself. Then, close your eyes again and reassess your SUD score. Repeat the process until you reach a 0 or until your SUD score stabilises.

Important points to remember:

  • Be patient and consistent: Self-Havening may take time and practice to be effective. Stick with it and be patient with yourself.
  • Focus on the physical sensations: Pay attention to the feeling of the touch and the rhythm of your movements. This helps ground you in the present moment and shift your focus away from distressing thoughts.
  • Use it as a tool: Self-Havening is a helpful technique for managing distress in the moment. It can be used alongside other coping strategies and therapies for anxiety and trauma.
  • Seek guidance if needed: If you’re struggling with significant emotional distress or trauma, consider working with a trained Havening Therapy practitioner who can provide guidance and support. They can offer Facilitated Havening, where they guide you through the process and may also apply Havening touch if desired.

By practicing Self-Havening regularly, you can rewire your brain’s response to stress and develop a greater sense of calm and resilience.

John Nolan

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